Hello and welcome
Hi there, thank you for reaching out to us.

We are sorry to hear that your child appears to be scared of her mother. A parent should be a safe person to turn to, and if a child is hitting herself and refusing to talk, it suggests she may be experiencing significant stress or distress.

Supporting your child
It is important that your child has a trusted adult she feels safe with, someone she can turn to and speak openly with about what is happening for her. You can play a key role in offering that safe, calm space, giving her opportunities to open up when she feels ready, without pressure.

Understanding emotional responses
It may help to keep in mind the idea often referred to as the Window of Tolerance. This describes how we all have times when we feel calm and able to think clearly, manage emotions, and cope with situations. At other times, we can feel overwhelmed, anxious, angry, or shut down. When a child is outside this window, they may struggle to communicate or regulate their behaviour. Keeping this in mind may help when approaching your child and responding to her needs.

Seeking further support
Given your child’s age and the behaviours you have described, it would be important to consider seeking additional support. In Ireland, you may wish to speak with your GP or contact local child and family support services such as Túsla, the Child and Family Agency, if you have concerns about your child’s safety or wellbeing.

Finally

We wish you well, and thank you for reaching out to the team. If you ever need the ISPCC Support Line, it is available from 9 am to 1 pm, Monday to Friday, at 01 522 4300.

Take care,

Robyn