Hey there, thank you so much for reaching out to us at Ask Robyn.

Starting daycare is a massive change for both you and your toddler, but please know that it’s completely normal for children to show separation anxiety during such a big transition. While each little one will react differently to drop-offs, one thing we can say for sure is that it won’t last forever—and there are steps you can take to make things easier for your toddler and for yourself.

1. Creeate a predictable morning routin

Toddlers thrive on routine—it gives them a sense of control and security.

Keep mornings calm, with the same steps each day (e.g. breakfast → get dressed → pack bag → drop-off).

2. Keep goodbyes short and sweet

Avoid lingering; say a warm, confident goodbye and leave promptly.

A drawn-out goodbye can unintentionally send the message that there’s something to worry about.

Try a goodbye ritual—like a hug, a kiss on both cheeks, and a special wave at the door.

3. Stay positive

Your child picks up on your emotions. Even if you feel upset, try to appear confident and calm.

Reassure them with something simple and predictable:

“You’re going to play, and I’ll be back right after your snack/lunch.”

4. Offer comfort items

If allowed, send a familiar object: a soft toy, blanket, or even a small photo of you.

5. Talk about daycare at home

Read books about going to crèche/daycare (see below), and talk positively about what they might do or who they’ll see.

Some great story options include:

• Llama Llama Misses Mama by Anna Dewdney
• Owl Babies by Martin Waddell (Irish author!)
• Bye-Bye Time by Elizabeth Verdick

6. Be consistent

Attending every day (or on consistent days) helps your toddler adjust more quickly.

Skipping days can make the transition harder and prolong the adjustment period.

Additional support in Ireland

Barnardos Ireland

Great parenting resources, including emotional support for transitions.

Free parenting helpline: 1800 910 123

Website: https://www.barnardos.ie

Parenting support from the HSE

Your public health nurse can offer advice tailored to your child.

More resources: https://www2.hse.ie

You’re not alone

It’s completely okay to feel emotional—this is a big transition for both of you.

Be sure to take time to look after yourself in the process.

If you need someone to talk to, you can reach out to us on the ISPCC Support Line at 01 522 4300, available Monday to Friday, 9:00 a.m. to 1:00 p.m., or email [email protected].

Take care of yourself, and know that you’re doing an amazing job.

Wishing you and your little one strength, patience, and comfort in the days ahead,

Robyn