Hi and welcome to Ask Robyn,

Thank you for reaching out to seek support. By asking this question, you are already taking positive steps to support your pre-teen. Recognising and naming what your child is struggling with is an important part of helping them, and it shows awareness and care.

Understanding anxiety in pre-teens

Anxiety can present in many different ways, such as sleep disruption, tummy aches, difficulty concentrating, or changes in mood. These experiences can vary greatly from one child to another. Paying attention to how anxiety affects your child specifically is a helpful starting point.

The pre-teen years can be challenging, as children experience significant physical, cognitive, and social and emotional changes. The level of support needed will often depend on how much anxiety is impacting your child’s day to day life.

When to seek professional support

If anxiety is preventing your child from engaging in regular activities or is significantly affecting their ability to function, it is important to seek professional support. Your GP is a good first point of contact and can refer your child to appropriate services if needed.

Practical ways to support your child at home

If the anxiety feels more manageable, there are several supportive steps you can take at home:

• Talk with your child and listen openly to what they have to say. Avoid dismissing their feelings and acknowledge their experiences.
• Maintain a regular routine where possible. Preparing your child in advance for any changes can help reduce feelings of overwhelm.
• Try relaxation activities together, such as breathing exercises, going for a walk, or humming. Explore what helps your child feel more regulated and take part alongside them.
• Work with your child to identify situations that cause worry. Name these as triggers and create a simple plan for how to cope if they arise. This can help build confidence and a sense of preparedness.
• Keep communication open so your child knows they can talk to you. Sharing age appropriate examples from your own experiences can help them feel less alone and understand that anxiety is something many people experience.

Further supports available

We at the ISPCC offer a digital programme for parents called Supporting an Anxious Child or Teen. This programme is available through our website at www.ispcc.ie. From the homepage, select the Our Services section, then go to Digital Mental Health and Wellbeing for more information and referral details. This programme provides additional tools and guidance for supporting your child.

Staying connected

If you would like to talk further, our Support Line is available Monday to Friday from 9am to 1pm on 01 522 4300. You are also welcome to email [email protected], with any other questions you may have.

We hope the information above is helpful, and we wish you and your child the very best moving forward.

Look after yourself,

Robyn