Your Question
My 9-year-old son is overweight and has been a victim of bullying at school and in the different clubs he participates in. He’s very sociable, but sometimes he tells me he feels sad about the comments other kids make during recess. I’ve told him he should speak to his teachers and try to play with other classmates, but it seems like the bullying is still affecting his happiness. I want to know how else I can help him. I’ve already started talking to him about taking care of his body, eating healthy, and avoiding sweets. I hope these habits will help him lose weight, but I’m concerned about the bullying he’s experiencing
Answer
Hi, and welcome to Ask Robyn.
Thank you for contacting us about your son, who is being bullied for being overweight. We are so sorry to hear that he is going through this, and it’s completely understandable that you want to help him navigate this tough situation. First of all, everything you’re doing sounds really supportive. You’re talking to him about making healthier choices, the importance of health, and encouraging him to talk to his teacher and play with other children. It’s understandable that this situation is difficult for him and upsetting. Your support will make a big difference in helping your son cope with the bullying and feel better about himself.
Here are some steps you can take to support him:
Listen and Validate His Feelings
•Create a safe space for him to share what’s happening without feeling judged.
•Let him know it’s okay to feel upset, hurt, or angry, and that you’re there to support him no matter what.
Boost His Self-Esteem
•Focus on his strengths and talents, and encourage activities where he feels confident and capable.
•Help him develop a positive body image by discussing how everyone’s body is different and valuable.
Teach Him How to Respond
•Equip him with strategies to respond to bullying, such as calmly walking away, using humour, or standing up for himself assertively.
•Role-play different situations so he feels prepared if it happens again.
Involve the School
•Talk to his teachers or school administrators about the bullying. Every school should have anti-bullying policies in place, and they can help address the issue.
•Make sure the school takes the situation seriously and follows up on any incidents.
Promote Healthy Habits without Pressure
•Encourage physical activity as a fun way to stay healthy, but avoid making it about weight loss. Focus on how exercise and balanced eating make him feel stronger and healthier, rather than focusing on appearance.
Be a Role Model
•Show confidence in your own body, avoid negative self-talk about weight, and emphasize that self-worth isn’t tied to physical appearance.
•Help him understand that respect for others and oneself is crucial, no matter what they look like.
Consider Professional Support
•If the bullying is affecting his mental health, a counsellor or therapist could help him process his feelings and build resilience.
•He can also contact Childline for support. We are always here to listen and help. He can get in touch with us via our chat service at www.childline.ie or call us at 1800 66 66 66. The team at Childline is here to listen, and we won’t judge or tell him what to do.
Here are some useful links:
•5 Great Tips on How to Avoid Being Affected by Bullying
•What to Do if Someone Bullies You at School
We hope this helps.
Robyn
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