My son doesn’t want to be in the Christmas play

Hi there and welcome to ask Robyn,

Thank you for getting in touch with what is going on for you. You have said that your son doesn’t want to be in their Christmas play. This can bring up a lot of feelings for you as well as your son. Some parents may feel disappointed as they may be looking forward to seeing their child in their show. It is really positive that your son has spoken to you about this and been able to express this.

It may be good to explore what he would like the outcome to be or why he doesn’t want to be in the show. He may be feeling anxious about being on stage or there could be some difficulties with his classmates around the show. It is important to help him identify the feeling that is coming up for him. If it is that he is anxious it may be good to help identify strategies that can help him cope with those feelings as it is normal to feel anxious and it is important for him to learn how to manage these feelings.

It may be good to have a conversation with his teacher about this and see if they have any suggestions such as if he might prefer standing at the back or have a different role so that he is still involved such as doing the lights or helping organise on the day.

At the end of the day all we want for our children is to be happy and if this is causing additional stress for him. Validate his feelings and now that is okay to feel this way. Depending on how you are feeling, it may help you to talk about this further as we are unsure of your child’s age or other needs your child may have. You can contact ISPCC’s Support Line which can be contacted by email to [email protected] or by phone from Monday to Friday 9am – 1pm on 01 522 4300 

Take care,  

Robyn